. Friends. Drama. Boys. Cars. Bustier Tops. Boots. Lace. Taylor Swift. Natalia Kills. Waffles. Chocolate. Ice-cream. Flip-flops and pink nail polish. Live. Laugh. Love. Nothing lasts forever. If God's watching, the least we can do is be entertaining. Rape my follow button. Fill my inbox. Will follow back if asked :)
you get the call halfway through a bowl of cereal and you don’t pick up on the first ring. sometimes when you look back on this moment, you pretend like you never picked up at all, but you did. you said something pointless into the other end, trying to be funny. your mouth was full.
the weird thing is, tragedy doesn’t just walk into your life, it blooms. it swells like a tickbite under your skin and sucks out every last emotion until you’re sitting there on a barstool, jaws clenched, completely silent as words find their way into your head. you start saying, “no, no, no, no, that’s wrong, that can’t be right,” but your mouth is still full and suddenly you’re choking, suddenly you’re sobbing, suddenly you’re on the floor of the kitchen curled up in a ball and nothing will ever be the same again.
you don’t live, you exist. things seem muted. things seem ridiculous. someone in your friend group is fighting with someone else about something that won’t matter in a year. you stand next to him and hear him chatter and just stare because everything is so incredibly, hideously alive.
you stand by her tombstone. you say, “god, i fucking miss you. this isn’t fucking fair.”
was your heart buried with her? you knock on your ribs but good god
there’s really nothing there."
I just want walls and walls of books, book I have read, books I want to read, just books, always books.